BALANCE…The New Foreign Language.

Are you a people pleaser? Do you say “YES” to certain things when you already know you don’t have the time, energy, or resources to make it happen, especially w/o taking away from something you’ve already committed to? Don’t feel bad folks. You are not alone! So, I want you to try something with me real quick. You ready? Ok…take a deep breath and say it with me… “NO!”

How do you feel? Well, one thing that many of us are missing in our lives is balance. This goes for every area; personal, financial, and yes… even in our spiritual lives with ministry, prayer, church commitments, etc.

If you have a heart for God, you find yourself wanting to get involved in every ministry possible. When I got saved a few years ago and joined my church, I was just so excited to be part of something worth-wild that I was active in every ministry I was asked to be part of. My default answer for my first year in the church was “YES!” I created, took pictures for, and maintained the church blog, regularly attended Bible Study, Choir rehearsal, Men’s shelter, Women’s shelter, Evangelizing, Marriage fellowships, and more…

My quality time at home consisted walking my dogs and seeing my husband in passing. I had started to feel burned out, but I still kept saying “YES”. I thought that if I said “NO” to those things, that I would in essence be saying “NO” to God. I knew that the Christian walk was not easy. I also realized things would not always be comfortable for me. So b/c of this, the conflict I was having about it inside, I just chucked it up to being tricks of the enemy.

With more study time reading, God started to show me otherwise. I realized one key piece to the puzzle:

Never once did I consult God on what HE was leading me to be involved in.

*Proverbs 2:10-11 (NIV) reads: For wisdom will enter your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you and understanding will guard you.* When God became the sole reason I got involved in certain ministries, instead of disappointment from man, the burdens lifted. Prayer had to become second nature to me. I am not saying that I have it all together, but I am further along than I once was…glory to God.  My advice is don’t say yes to ANYTHING w/o consulting the Holy Spirit first.

About a year ago, Holy Spirit was leading me into the book of Exodus. I must admit, I have been the type of person to read parts of the bible that speak to my situations…that minister to me most. The Moses stuff just really didn’t stick to me and to be honest, I found it a boring book to read. So I ignored the urging to read it. Then a few months ago, I was looking at a talk show and a girl on the stage was named Exodus. Hearing her name put it on my heart to start reading and I read the whole book.

Shortly thereafter, God put The Bold and The Fabulous on my heart. I was excited. I wanted to just get it started immediately. But God said, “WAIT! This vision is too large for you alone. You need a team…partners. Pray. Trust me and remember the conversation between Moses and his Father-In-Law (Exodus 18:13-25).”  Sometimes we need to tell ourselves “NO!”

In closing, “NO” is not a bad word. If you’re connected to Holy Spirit, He will make you fully aware of where you are needed. If you don’t heed to that, you will be disciplined. Seek God to know the difference between being obedient to God and/or to man. God gives us gifts and strengths to be used to glorify Him and bring others to a knowledge of Him. So this is not a discouragement of ministry. Please involve yourself in ministry as God leads. But also don’t lose focus of your priorities of life overall. Know your strengths and weaknesses. Pray for discernment. Value your marriage. Foster Godly friendships. Have realistic expectations. Listen to the still voice. Know that you are not alone.  Be FABULOUSLY BOLD. And lastly, hold Proverbs 19:21 in your heart; “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”

*Wednesdays w/ iNDIGO*

About boldandfab

Where Being A Witness Meets Chic Sophistication! Where Every Word Has Profound Meaning. It's all us...ALL REAL! B & F.
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18 Responses to BALANCE…The New Foreign Language.

  1. Bianca says:

    Awesome…awesome… awesome! We all fight this battle. Just say “No”… sometimes!! =0)

  2. Sis this is the story of my life!!!!! Thanks for this!

  3. Jada Cleveland says:

    Awesome blog, thanks for making sure I got chance to read it. 🙂


    WOw!..what you are communicating in this blog is so true!….I have felt burned out so many times because I would say yes to everything thinking how dare I not do this or that…especially when you can be surrounded by people who can try and submit the guilt trip your way and say that your not giving God your all….NO….I’M NOT GIVING GOD YOUR ALL…I’m a behind the scenes type person and just making sure you see my praise does not make me a back slider….AWwh if so many could look through the window payne of my life..THE LORD KNOWS HE IS LORD OF MY LIFE….at my my marriage… a mother!

  5. Mr Jones says:

    Amen…Amen… LOVED this post!

  6. boldandfab says:

    SIIIIIS….Thank you!!! Conformation(AGAIN). God does TRULY know my heart & He KNOWS the decision I’m STRUGGLING with right NOW…Thank you for LETTING Him USE YOU!!! I LOVE the piece about focusing on your Marriage and FOSTERING GODLY FRIENDSHIPS b/c WE can be TRULY TRYING to PLEASE man by saying YES YES YES to EVERYTHING THINKING that we are DISAPPOINTING God and because of our ABSENCE not just PHYSICAL but MENTAL at home or with Friends that God wants us to LEAD by EXAMPLE to Christ, WE could ACTUALLY be DISAPPOINTING Him by NOT INVESTING HIM in THOSE relationships!!! BALANCE BALANCE BALANCE!! I learned THAT the HARD way…BUT PRAISE God, He CLEARLY allowed me to KNOW what I NEED to be FOCUSED on RIGHT NOW & Maybe in the future if it’s HIS WILL I will be MORE involved in MORE;-) AGAIN…THANK YOU!!! for YOUR transparency…

    S. Carter

  7. Tristan Lewis says:

    OMG, please get out of my head Indigo. Thank you 100X over for this. It came right on time. You ladies keep it up.

  8. iNDIGO says:

    @ B: I agree w/ you on the “sometimes”. It’s all about relationship & what GOD is leading.
    @ JenniLu: I appreciate you taking the time to read sis. I know you have A LOT on your plate. I’m overjoyed that it spoke to you.
    @ Jada: YAY!!! I’m here each and every Wednesday sis!! Come on back and check me out next week.
    @ Marquita: Girl, I SOOOO love your line, “No I’m not giving God YOUR all.” That was powerful. Glad the blog was a blessing to you.
    @ Thank you Mr. Jones.
    @ Bold&FabSister: Indeed sis. One of the biggest parts of having balance is knowing how to offset guilt and most importantly, knowing when it is God convicting or man slinging it. I praise Him for putting this on my heart.
    @ Tristan: So glad it ministered to you. Thank you for your continued support and encouragement.

  9. Evangelist Kenny Easton says:

    Thanks Indi! For Confirmation on some things in ministry that i do but should’nt because i say yes, so i won’t be talked about in church, or so my name will be good because i support everything the church does! But I find i dont have time for other things i need to do! Thank you Holy Spirit! Thank u Indi!

  10. Kendra says:

    I loved this..I have felt this way all my adult life when it comes to family and the desire to want to do all the ministries possible but I’ve realized I have ministries I didnt even pay attention to, such as my marriage, being a mom and so forth. I have been doing my best to be a better friend, mom, wife and before that a called child of the most HIGH!! Awesome and on point I must say!! May the Lord Jesus Christ continue to bless you 🙂

  11. iNDIGO says:

    @KEaston: Thank you SOOOOO much for taking the time to read my post bro. Means a lot to me. I am praising God for breakthru moments.
    @ Kendra: Thanks for reading hun. Each of us are on our own path and in order to live to the fullest for God, we just have to get to a point where He is the ONLY reason for the decisions we make. Our focus should be to worship Him, but he didn’t give us family, friends, and other things for them to be ignored…just not supposed to put before Him. Balance is key.

  12. Mom Dukes says:

    “Look here, you people who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to such and such a town, stay there a year, and open up a profitable business. How do you know what is going to happen tomorrow? For the length of your lives is as uncertain as the morning fog, now you see it, soon it is gone. What you OUGHT to say is, If the Lord wants me to, we shall live and do this or that, otherwise you will be bragging about your own plans and such self-confidence NEVER pleases God.” James 4:13-16

  13. iNDIGO says:

    Amen to that Mom Dukes. Thank you for the scripture reference. Beautiful.

  14. Tinesha Thomas says:

    Enough said sis!! I have always struggled with “balance” in my life as a christian. God has a way of showing us the hard way, that the only we should be striving to please is Hi. Because in the end all that matters is “why” we did what we did??? I love it!! :0)

  15. iNDIGO says:

    I’m happy it blessed you. I’m sure every Christian have dealt w/ this at some points in our walk, but how long does it remain a struggle before we pass the test?! I get it now more than I ever have and wanted to share.
    Thank you for reading and commenting sis. Means a lot to me.

  16. Rickey E. Macklin says:

    Amen! Awesome Blog! Wow — I remember being at church 6 days a week when I first truly committed my life to God… Strange thing is I didn’t know I could say “no” when it came down to the work of the Lord 🙂 I felt I owe Him a yes in everything. I guess I didn’t realize that it wasn’t always God who was asking me to do stuff but people who saw my heart and availability. It took someone to speak into my life those simply words of wisdom “its ok to say no”. God does want us balance and that’s why he’s purposed for us to experience peace with the whole-man (body, soul & soul) – 1 Thess. 5:23

    BALANCE RICKEY! By the way, still telling myself that 🙂

    Awesome Blog iNDIGO’!

  17. iNDIGO says:

    Amen Rickey!!! No doubt about it bro. I LOOOVE the scripture reference too. Thank you so much for reading. Happy it blessed you today.

  18. Morten says:

    hey, I like this

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