Creeping Thoughts

On the sofa, I lounged. My Feet propped up on the coffee table like a pair of drumsticks abandoned on a snare. The bright glare of the television illuminated my face and defeated the darkness only to where the couch ends. I flipped through channels like the glossy pages of fashion magazine. Everything I saw bored me. Sigh said my lungs. “Ooh, HBO”, I thought and jumped to the channel. There too, they failed to conquer my ennui. So I continued to browse.

            I checked the time. “Oh, wow, it’s 1:05 A.M. already?”, I mumbled. Perhaps I should hit the hay. But I continued through the premium channels. HBOs. Cinemaxes. Showtimes.“Oooh,” I declared, with pleasantness, as I landed on one channel. My eyes were delighted by the sight of a woman who possessed her beauty very well! She stood at the foot of a bed in a room, and performed what appeared to be strip show. Her voluptuous body aroused my lustfulness.

My thumb boycotted the up button on the remote, and my eyes attended her, intently. She removed her blouse and danced around a little. Then she dropped her skirt with tenderness.

“Keep it moving,” said the Spirit. “Wait, lemme if she’s going to do anything,” I told Him.

She continued to move her body to the rhythm of the music coming out of a stereo somewhere in the room. The camera panned to a man spread out on the bed, gleaming with excitement—as was I. Back to her, the camera went. She removed her bra, and the gifts endowed by her Creator shined at us. The camera showed the man on the bed was feeling what I was.

“You’ve seen too much,” the Spirit chimed in. Again, I tuned Him out.

The seductress peeled off the rest of her skimpy coverings and went off to be consumed.

Sigh, went the Spirit. The eyes of my heart could see Him hanging His head, shaking it. Finally, I moved on to another channel, as not to see too much. But it was too late. 

I know ALL Christian men (perhaps women too) have found themselves in the same situation I was in on this late night. While I must say that what I saw that night did not inflame any sexual desires in me at that time, those very same images however, had been dumped in my mental vault.

Quick question: What do you do with a vault? Exactly! And those images had been deposited in mine and locked away. And if you’re unaware, the devil has access to our minds and can play with anything in there if God grants him permission. Those images seared in my mind were now available for the devil’s use for my rainy days of weakness.

            The times my thoughts wander, and the fire of my loneliness ignites by sights of couples lovey-doveying here and there, and my body begin to yearn for the passion of her whom God has appointed at His future time for me, the devil will make a withdrawal from my vault and assault me with it. We all know what’s probably going to happen next.

            This has happened to me countless times, and God, in His infinite mercies, gave me the grace to finally ask, “How can I prevent this from happening again?”

            He answered: “Disarm the devil, and he will have no power over you.”

            “Lord, how?” I said. “Well, if you guard your eyes against those things. Don’t watch those shows, then you won’t have anything to think about. Then the devil won’t have anything to beat you with in those days,” He told my heart.

If we keep our eyes (and attention) away from sinful things, we are more empowered to live for Christ. Our soul is alive and in constant praise. But when we do contrarily, the devil erupts those memories in our times of weakness and demoralizes our armor with them. Before we know it, we’re mired in the pit of sin and become distant from God, leaving us open to all sorts of attacks.

But thank God we have a longsuffering God who will always take us back when we fall. But don’t get Him twisted, He’ll put you over His lap and redden your behind first. But you’ll be alive again.

Guest Blogger :: Tunde Adepoju

About boldandfab

Where Being A Witness Meets Chic Sophistication! Where Every Word Has Profound Meaning. It's all us...ALL REAL! B & F.
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5 Responses to Creeping Thoughts

  1. tinaf07 says:

    cool post! I will definately share this story with others. It’s good to know your enemy as you know yourself. The images are not just on late night TV but on grocery store magazine stands, music videos, and even regular TV shows, skimply clad wearing women can send sensual messages to ppl’s minds. Even your own vanity can lead you to think you have to be flirtatious to impress others. But it’s better to be watchful and pray so that you won’t fall into the traps and snares of temptation.

  2. indigo says:

    Thanx for your honesty Tunde. I pray this post blesses someone who needs to hear it. Blessings to you.

  3. Mom Dukes says:

    WoW….I’ll never know how hard this openness had to be for you, my brother! But the Lord knows how much you wanted forgiveness and then GAVE it to you.. so that’s all that matters! Stay close to the Lord.. He’ll guide your heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Keep fighting the GOOD fight, cause God ALWAYS wins in the end!!!

  4. Monisha S. Carter says:

    AWESOME post my Brother!!! Your TRANSPARENCY was amazing & PRAISE GOD 4 IT….I actually have those SAME feelings about listening to SECULAR music & I stay AS FAR from it as possible b/c “FOR ME” it brings back those OLD MEMORIES when I was SOOOO IN THE WORLD & I’m a “NEW” person(THRU CHRIST) & CHOOSE not to LOOK BACK!!! So, I do know how those “FLESHLY FEELINGS” can CREEEEP up on you….OH YES I DO!!! Again, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, for your honesty THRU CHRIST & your CONTINUOUS support of B&F(Your sisters in Christ) …..I’m OUT!!!!


  5. Tunde says:

    Thank you all for your comments! I am pleased that you are touched be it. It is an honor for me to be used by God to convey His message to His people. Look forward to more from me, and in the interim, check out more Godly entertainment on my website:

    Be well. And all the glory to the King!


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