b&f3In recent years, “Stay in your lane” has become a statement which has nothing to do with driving on a highway, and everything to do with respecting the order of life and relationships. The meaning of the saying is — to mind one’s own business; to keep moving straight ahead without veering into others’ personal affairs. i.e. “I know what’s best for my child and don’t need your advice about it so just stay in your lane!” Over time, the meaning of this saying has begun to evolve into what I consider an avenue of territory that needs to be addressed.
     From a standpoint of things being done in decency and in order within the church, I completely understand how staying in your lane, is looked upon in a positive light. I mean, really…who wants chaos and confusion running amuk in the church, or any fellowship, organization, or business. There shouldn’t be too many cooks in the kitchen at once. In Acts 6, the disciples chose seven men to delegate meals and tend to neglected widows, so that they could stay focused on their call to pray, preach the Gospel, and fulfill the great commission. Had they not chosen others for that task and instead, chosen to do it themselves, it could’ve had dire consequences to the path that Jesus had them on.
     Now, what about staying in our lane regarding our purpose/what God is speaking to our lives? I wish I felt comfortable posting photos of screen shots of different people’s IG, Twitter, & Facebook pages…where daily there are countless people preaching and endorsing the Stay In Your Lane In Life message. Y’all know you’ve seen it too.
That person who’s been married less than five years, who is now a self-proclaimed marriage expert…telling you that you’re not married yet because you haven’t stayed in your lane within your singleness.
That person who’s doing well on their job, who is now telling you that you’re not making the kind of money you want because you didn’t stay in your lane on your job.
That person who says, “Here is what I did to succeed in this area and here is the blueprint” but in the next breath says, “People really need to stay in their lane. My journey is not meant to be duplicated.”
That person who advises a music Producer to stay in their lane and continue making beats, when he/she expresses a desire to become a singer/rapper or explore a completely unrelated field.
b&f3The examples could go on. Yeah, I’m sure we all have a God-given assignment in this life. Just being real, I don’t believe it’s always what we even think it is or what we’d like it to be. I firmly believe there are a lot of people who are doing it big…living in their so-called purpose, who are going to later discover, those were only paths to the true assignment, which they would’ve gotten to regardless because that destination is God’s will to begin with. Things that make you go hmmm. lol.
     Subsequently, I have a question. Is it possible that not every believer knows his/her “purpose” yet? Just because you claim to hear God’s audible voice in your ear, doesn’t mean we all do…some of us actually have the manifestation of His Word in our hearts and make decisions accordingly. Call me cynical, but I think we have become a culture of super-spiritual, non-effective Christians, who have become purpose-obsessed instead of God-driven. Sorry lane-maker, but my God isn’t stuck in your box. My life…my existence is far too fabulous not to jump out there sometimes; just to see if there is any value my light can add to these shadows and dark places. My apologies in advance if doing so takes me into your imaginary lane.
     I’m so thankful for all the times I didn’t stay in my lane. Sure, there are times where it probably would’ve suited me best to do so, but even in those scenarios, I’m sure that it was still for my good. The bottom line is that we need to focus on Christ and His Word. We need to dwell there and He will lead and guide our path. Sometimes there are signs on the road that tell us what’s up ahead. Those signs are God’s way of telling you to either stay in that lane or take a detour. Pay attention to Him and no one else because regardless of what lane we travel, steer clear of, share, create, or blaze, I am positive that what God has for me is for me. No matter who jumps in my lane, can never change that.
See y’all next week.
*Wednesdays with Indigo*b&f1

About boldandfab

Where Being A Witness Meets Chic Sophistication! Where Every Word Has Profound Meaning. It's all us...ALL REAL! B & F.
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11 Responses to STAY IN YOUR LANE…OR NAH?!

  1. I don’t care how long it took you to write this! It was on point!! I’ve been one to think that I’m good at a few things and therefore should stay within those “lanes” but the more I grow in my relationship with God the more He is challenging me to step out into unfamiliar territory and though scary at times, it’s exciting and I look forward to seeing who I become as a result! Great post sis!

  2. Got Sisters? says:

    This article makes me recall something I may have posted a couple of weeks ago but it keeps ringing in my head… When u focus on sharpening urself that’s when u are on point… I think for my own personal growth I have to stay in my lane… focus on my goal… the world, people, things can be so distracting… But yes there are times that I am required to “step out of my lane” per se because I have learned or experienced things that may be of service to someone else and so what comes to mind for me is “each one, teach one” or “when u get, u give.” And so ‘staying in your lane’ has a more selfish connotation to me. I mean you should mind your own business but if you know about a situation isn’t it your business to be a blessing? Because, no, you can’t save the world but, yes, what people don’t know can hurt them…

    Am I off the topic here??? LOL

    • Jocelyn "iNDIGO" Saunders says:

      Not off topic AT ALL sis. Your comment has some amazing points. And I agree 110% about staying in your lane, has become a sort of selfish connotation of sorts…sometimes, it’s not about what is said as much as it is about HOW it is, which is probably what sparked my passion behind what I wrote to begin with. lol. You’re so correct. I am a habitual lane jumper in life…I’m just not wired to stay in a lane for too long & I respect that we’re all wired differently; so I’m not a fan of folks throwing around and imposing their view onto others w/o knowing their full story/testimony. In that regard, those folks imposing their will need to STAY IN THEIR LANE!!! lol. Thank you so much for reading and commenting.

    • Nastassja says:

      I’m just going to jump in here too. My recent post, “Stay in your lane” shares your exact sentiment. Stay focused on what your own purpose – at the same time however (and against the negative connotation), I believe staying in your lane frees you from jealousy, and allows you to be unselfish and celebrate others, and hurt when others are hurting (and of course be a blessing as is required from us).

      I find it interesting how this phrase has different meanings for everyone.

  3. Mrs B. Carter says:

    Well Sis it has been MANY times that you “Steered in MY LANE” and I PRAISE GOD for those moments. I feel that as we MATURE we will begin to TRULY UNDERSTAND that people jumping in & out of “OUR LANES” shouldn’t matter & as a matter of fact the ONLY JUMPING that should CATCH your attention are the POSITIVE ones. I don’t sweat the SMALL stuff in “MY LANE” (Drives FORWARD & BEEPS the horn) 😉 GREAT POST SIS……Mwuuuuuah!!!

  4. missify says:

    Oh, those paths that other people think we should be on (because it fits with their theology)…sigh… Girl, this deserves a part dos! As long as God is our map, we ain’t got to worry about the lane. Love this! (‘cuz you know I drive all over the place 🙂

    • Jocelyn "iNDIGO" Saunders says:

      Thanx for your continued support Ify! And I LOVE your lane jumping & drving sis…TRAIL BLAZIN’ FOR DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Nastassja says:

    I really like this post. I’ve just written a post on staying in your lane, but in the context where I encourage people to stay in theirs. Staying in your lane, to me, means you “pay attention to Him and nothing else”. Staying in your lane, to me, means you’re not trying to live someone else’s life – you’re therefore not jealous or envious of what’s going on in another’s life. And indeed, we don’t all have our purpose figured out, I don’t think anyone has it down 100% – but how can you find your purpose, and live it, if you’re worried about what the next person’s doing? Obviously we see this phrase from a different perspective (and with a different meaning?) and it’s interesting to discover.

  6. Nastassja says:

    And I think it’s ridiculous that people would speak from a point of authority, and say so and so has done done this or that because they don’t stay in their lane. That’s just judgement. Again, however, proving the different context we place this phrase in.

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