If you have not checked out Indigo’s last few blogs, you may wanna start there first because what I’m about to dig into aligns nicely with hers…sort of lol
Yall, I lie to you not, I LEGITIMATELY cannot fit any of my pants anymore. In just one week I ripped two pairs of jeans in the inner thigh, broke zippers on another two, and simply couldn’t get others up above my knee. I literally cried the other day in reflecting on the harsh reality that I have gained weight. Where I once believed I would always be a size 2, and no more than a 4 in some places, I now realize a 6 is REAL LIFE happening to me. I know some of yall are giving me a MAJOR side eye right now, but just hear me out lol. Growing up I was always small, in fact my mama used to tease me with “skinny Minnie” (which I HATED). It wasn’t until middle school where adolescent puberty kicked my butt and I picked up some weight. By the time I reached high school I was a tad chunky and eventually slimmed down when I started cheerleading. From then until now, I’ve consistently worn sizes 2-4, as an active lifestyle in sports and training did my body good. Do yall know I tried a toe touch a few weeks back and could barely get off the ground? I even landed wrong and nearly broke my knees..Lord help me. Anyway, while I’ve noticed the pounds piling on, apparently others have too, but the response has been overwhelmingly positive; my mama commenting, “child good, you needed some weight.” ::SIDE EYE:: An ex even recently told me, “the weight looks great on you”. Eh. Whatever.
Not that I needed their affirmation, but I must say it helped in accepting that this may simply be a factor of age and perhaps something I can’t necessarily change (but that doesn’t mean I won’t be hitting the gym now). Nonetheless, I feel like my weight gain is SOOOOO relevant in my spiritual walk as I’ve been in a season where God has piled so much weight on me in the last three years. I’ve literally been stretched in ways I never knew I could be, leaving me with so many spiritual stretch marks as evidence of my growth. Sometimes the weight on us may seem tough to cope with, but its all in how we wear it. How do you deal with stressful burdens? Do you sulk in sadness and throw a pity party or do you still praise God? Other times, the weight God puts on us can be good weight, or in other words the evidence that we are being fed well (say at church or through a ministry).
The last point I’ll insert here is in something I heard on a talk show that almost made me jump out my own skin (as my oratorically-savvy pastor would say). Julie Chen, host of “The Talk” (the CBS equivalent to “The View”), recently held a debate topic about women who are criticized with weight gain from pregnancy. While the perspectives varied, Julie chimed in by sharing that in her culture (she identifies as Chinese), women are fed a plentiful, fatty diet as a way to actually gain weight after a birth. She explained that the tradition encourages a new mother to become fuller and plush as a way to comfort, nourish, and support their new baby in the first few months of life. In the spiritual realm, it makes just as much sense. When God gives us an idea to bring forth or a project to see through, He will also put some weight on us so that we can grow to be strong enough to support and nourish this endeavor. Whether its physical weight I’m carrying or spiritual, I’m learning that sometimes bigger is in fact better.
Yall know I’m a teacher by trade, so I’ll leave you with some reflection questions as we grow in our faith:
- Are you being fed well? Can it be seen in weight gain?
- Are you embracing your weight gain?
- Does your weight look good on you? Do you wear it well?
- Are you nourishing your baby with the right foods?
Love yall and I’ll catch you next week!!!