If You Ask Me That…….ONE MORE TIME!

1st Corinthians 7:32 “I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided.”


As some of you may know my first born son is finishing up his senior year (SHOUT OUT TO C/O 2014) and last friday he went to his prom ALL BY HIMSELF. Yes my son is 18 yrs old (19 in Sept), smart, independent, loving, kind, HANDSOME ^_^ & YES…… SINGLE.

He began preparing for his prom over the past few months and in that time a few young ladies inquired about joining him; however, he CHOSE to go alone. OK OK Monisha get to the POINT LOL…..I had a TON of folks ask “so who’s he taking to prom with him?” which is actually a normal (I GUESS) question to inquire about someone going to the prom. HOWEVER, the questions KEPT going into “so why is he going by himself?” “why would he WANT to go to prom alone?” “He sure he wants to go solo?” UMMMMMM YES!

My son has had two SERIOUS relationships with two beautiful/VERY intelligent  young ladies (that are still very close with the Carter 5) within his teenage yrs, he’s been single for a while now and he’s HAPPY (& VERY FOCUSED ON HIS FUTURE) with that. I feel these teenagers and SOME ADULTS feel the NEED to be in a relationship and that desire can EASILY lead them into messy situations at times. It’s important to get to know YOURSELF and fall in love with YOU (it doesn’t happen overnight) before you KEEP jumping from BOO to BOO.

Brian (my son) shared with me that ONE of the main reasons he wanted to go SOLO was because he wanted to ENJOY HIMSELF….ALL BY HIMSELF and that it was HIS NIGHT (HIS ONE & ONLY PROM) & HE JUST WANTED TO DO HIM. The day of his prom a young lady he’s known since 5th grade came over to visit before she went home to prepare for her prom that evening and as we sat in the kitchen she began to tell us how NERVOUS she was that her date wasn’t going to show up. Of course I questioned her feelings and she shared that he went to his prom last year and that he was just accompanying her this year. I also inquired why she felt that way, she shared the DAY PRIOR to the prom he tried to BACK OUT but decided to go….WHAT???? You could see the hurt and anxiety in her face and I felt so bad for her, not only did she feel he really didn’t want to go to HER PROM… BUT she felt uncertain of him even showing up.

Of course I gave her a few words of encouragement ending the conversation with SHOW OR NO SHOW …..YOU GO WITH YOUR BEAUTIFUL SELF AND SHOW UP & SHOW OUT ALONE…IT’S YOUR DAY & YOU WON’T GET IT BACK SO HAVE FUN!!!

She thanked me for our talk but that’s just the drama my son was DODGING that night. Though I felt irritated with the “Why is he going alone questions” and thought MANY times “If you ask me that one more time” I was glad that those who FELT he NEEDED a date saw how JOYOUS my baby the evening of his prom…ALL BY HIMSELF! He said he danced the night away, went to an after prom celebration and just ENJOYED HIS MOMENT so of course I was ALL SMILES^_^.

Today I want to ENCOURAGE at LEAST ONE to UNDERSTAND it’s ACTUALLY ok to be by YOURSELF and that in your SINGLE moments learn how to love & ENJOY YOU. When you know how to FULLY love/enjoy YOURSELF in the moment when God sends that special someone you will be FULLY capable of allowing them to JOIN IN on that self-love and their love will be an EXTRA BONUS to what you ALREADY have WITHIN.

Be     In Love With You

Be     Single If That’s What You CHOOSE

Be      Not SETTLING For Just ANYONE

Be      Prepared for that EXTRA BONUS

Be       Knowing You WORTH………

~Fridays w/ Monisha~

prom 1 prom 4 prom 3 prom 5 prom 2

Proud Mom Dukes ^_*


About boldandfab

Where Being A Witness Meets Chic Sophistication! Where Every Word Has Profound Meaning. It's all us...ALL REAL! B & F.
This entry was posted in Fridays with Monisha. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to If You Ask Me That…….ONE MORE TIME!

  1. YES!!! Love this! Have fun and enjoying yourself to fullest!!!!

  2. Celine says:

    Thank you Sis and nephew for that encouraging and empowering confirmation. It’s not easy to stand alone and DO YOU in a society that places your value in being coupled. Kudos to you Brian for such a mature stance, and you mom for supporting him. I know I’m being prepared and enjoying the preparation. Love y’all. Celine

  3. Bobbie Patterson says:

    Moe I think this message was absolutely beautiful. I pray more teenagers as well as adults will take heed to this message. It’s nothing wrong with loving yourself & being single. Just becuz you single doesn’t mean you’re are lonely. WAIT PATIENTLY FOR THE BONUS GOD HAS FOR YOU.

  4. Jocelyn "iNDIGO" Saunders says:

    This is hilarious. Thought provoking and well thought out but hilarious b/c I know you…I am picturing the annoyance every time you got the question. lol. I think some people only asked b/c they knew there was a date before and didn’t know the plan had changed. But STILL…it’s not that serious to be getting interrogated about it, etc. If HE was comfortable (clearly he was) rolling solo, then why would anyone else be concerned about it. I think it’s refreshing to see kids who are so comfortable in their own skin that they don’t mind going against ‘the grain’ a bit and doing things outside of the traditional sense. Very refreshing indeed. He looked so fly btw. I loved the whole get up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. hank lloyd says:

    My grandson knows what he wants, and he will go get it, because he has great sense about life

    Proverbs 19:11 – Good sense makes a man restrain his anger, and it is his glory to overlook a transgression or an offense.

    Every day, we have opportunities to get upset, frustrated or offended. Maybe you had plans that didn’t work out, or someone was rude to you at the office or school. Maybe you were doing something that should have taken one hour and ended up taking three. Life is full of inconveniences. Even though we can’t always control our circumstances, we can control our reaction. They say, “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond.”

    We should always go out each day with a positive attitude, full of hope and expecting God’s favor. But at the same time, we should recognize that most days are not going to go exactly as we planned. However, we are created to live in peace. Peace is our position of power. If you get stressed because you got off schedule, or upset because your child wouldn’t eat his breakfast, or frustrated because somebody offended you, you are giving away your power. Instead, use good sense! Make the decision to release those offenses and disappointments so you live in peace. Overlook offense, release offense and move forward in the power and victory the Lord has for you!

    Prayer for Today: Father, today I release every care, concern, offense and disappointment to You. I choose to keep the peace that You have given me knowing that with You, my best days are ahead and it is alright to be alone to you send me my mate for life. in Jesus’ name! Amen.

    Have a blessed day!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s