Three years ago, I found out I have Cardiac Dysrhythmia, also known as Arrythmia, or in layman terms, an irregular heartbeat. I remember how scared I was when I was first diagnosed because heart disease runs on my moms side of the family. I’ve lost uncles to heart attacks and heart failure related strokes. My mom even has a heart murmur. And upon getting information about it…finding out it can result in cardiac arrest, the fear escalated. But, even with that fear, I remember a certain peace that came with the diagnosis because at least I finally had one!!!
You see, for many years, I would feel so weird. I mean, I already had bouts with pretty severe Anxiety (I actually blogged about that before… feel free to get caught up https://boldandfab.wordpress.com/2010/09/22/boo-scared-you-didnt-i/ ). But it was always a trip when I wasn’t experiencing anxiety, but still dealing with my heart in my chest feeling like it was trying to break out. For real y’all. I would be totally relaxed and/or sleeping and out of nowhere, I would be awakened by the escalations of my heart beat. It was crazy. I often felt I was dying when it would happen…would get dizzy and even sometimes feel a little weak.
I had told two different Primary Care Physicians about it over a ten year period, but they would just tell me it was latent anxiety and prescribe me more medication. Finally, I got a referral to a Cardiologist and was told to wear a heart monitor for a few days so they could track my heart rate. When I went back to for my follow-up, the results indicated what I was experiencing for years was not my imagination, but in fact real. I was given my diagnosis and the appropriate medication and treatment options. Since that day, I have remained on the medication and have not had to deal with the disruptive escalating heart rate that had become so commonplace in my life.
I used this analogy to encourage you to trust your instincts. Our body triggers us to feel things for a reason. In general, don’t allow people to tell you something is in your mind, when you know full well it isn’t. People tend to say that often with regards to when we get a bad feeling about something based on how someone is treating us or treating us differently than before. Don’t be paranoid and don’t assume. Ask the questions that need to be asked…seek out what’s REALLY going on, but trust your gut as well.
I just want to leave you tonight, with something my husband posted to his Instagram page a couple of days ago.
Do what you need to do to get to the bottom of what feels off without obsessing about it.
That’s all for now folks.
*Wednesdays With INDIGO*