Access Denied

do-not-disturb1Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” – Mark 6:31

We live in a time where people have access to us 24/7. But if you’re open 24/7, when do you rest, refresh, recharge? Have you ever noticed how your phone battery never fully recharges or recharges much slower if you’re using it while it’s on the charger? I don’t know about you, but it’s the same for me. I don’t ever feel fully recharged when I allow people to have constant contact with me. They don’t care that they aren’t the only one asking for my time and energy. Since I’m the one who cares, I’m the one who must do something about it. I’m starting to figure out that I need to make some adjustments to the level of access to me that I allow. My busy schedule coupled with my daughter’s makes finding time alone a hard task.

The thought occurred to me that I could turn my phone off at an appointed time. When I was growing up, my parents did not take calls after 9:30pm. If someone called after that time, it had to have been an emergency. However, in the age of the smartphone it’s hard to disconnect and unplug for a bit because so many apps that make life easier are on there – music, notes, food and activity journal, social media, even my wake-up alarm. I never turn my phone off. At times I don’t want to be tuned into, but want to tune in… You know? Just scroll and read. But then there are people who see that you are tuned in and want to engage in conversation. I hate the feature that allows people to see when I am online. There are people who will call, text and message any time of the day or night without thought of the hour. How do I set boundaries?

Lately I’ve felt exhausted, even irritable around people. I know it’s because I’m always around people. I’m an introvert at heart, so I know that I must find time to disconnect so that I can truly get refreshment and recharge.

Limiting access to you is important. Few people should have full access to your life anyway. Being selective with whom I share certain aspects of my life has been hard for me at times. Where my closest friend is learning to be more open, I’m learning to be more closed. Up until recently I’d been an open book to anyone. Perhaps that is part of the reason she’s been placed in my life; for me to learn from her skills. I’m definitely realizing that there are decisions that I make that do not have to be explained.

It’s not healthy for me to be wide open for full access nor is it healthy to be completely closed off. Honestly, I have to keep in mind Hebrews 10:25, because I actually enjoy alone time A LOT, especially now that it is so rare. I have to remember that it’s important to connect as well. Where’s the balance? I’m sure finding it will be trial and error.

So I’m working on finding and maintaining my balance between being open and closed. So at times you will look for me and get – ACCESS DENIED. Just know that it’s me taking the time to recharge, so I can be the best me the next time we interact. (Here I go again explaining myself.)

I’ll be trying out different ways to disconnect until I find what works for me. This will be my next thing to try out –


What about you? How do you disconnect and recharge? Or do you? ❤


About boldandfab

Where Being A Witness Meets Chic Sophistication! Where Every Word Has Profound Meaning. It's all us...ALL REAL! B & F.
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